Scorpio

Scorpio

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

ScorpioTaurus, Cancer, Libra, and Scorpio are travelling through Kansas. A tornado whisks them away to Oz. Once they figure out where they are, Taurus announces, “I’ll ask the wizard for a brain.” “Courage for me,” peeps Cancer. Libra says, “I’ll request a heart.” “Ha!” snorts Scorpio derisively. “What I want are kick-ass talents for seeing everyone’s hidden agendas, feeling rare and extreme feelings no one in the history of the world has ever experienced, and finding God through fucking.” “But you’ve already mastered all those skills,” protests Libra. “True,” says Scorpio, “but I don’t have any weaknesses that need fixing, and besides, I want to see what happens when I’m twice as much myself as I’ve ever been before.”
 

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Basically Just Drink All the Way Through

The Lord of the Rings Drinking Game

Drink ‘Till You’re In Middle Earth

Drink When:

  1. Close-up of the ring.
  2. PANORAMIC SCENERY SHOT!
  3. Merry and Pippin get up to shenanigans.
  4. Frodo wanders away from the group.
  5. Gandalf goes into SERIOUS WIZARD mode.
  6. Intimate moment between Frodo and Sam.
  7. Legolas doesn’t understand emotions/says something obvious.
  8. Frodo looks like he’s jizzing himself.
  9. Entire Fellowship on screen!

Hardcore Mode:

  1. Aragorn does something badass.
  2. Legolas looks into the distance.
  3. The ring is referred to as “Precious”
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